scoring

okay nerds, this is for you

every scene has a potential 100 points

30 points are available for performances (15 per performer, or 10 each for threesomes): looking for believability in roles, engagement, distinctive personalities, enthusiasm during sex (or a reason why not), good improvisation of dialogue as necessary. i will try hard not to give extra points to my faves when there are a lot of people i haven't paid much attention to before, but biases exist and my faves are faves because they are good at the above

25 points are available for cinematography: looking at lighting, shot composition, staging, use of color, camera fluidity, visual interestingness. i am quickly bored and have high standards (i think most television and half of Hollywood movies are horribly shot), so low scores here will be routine

20 points are available for editing: looking for flow, repetitiveness, crew bloopers, quality of music and graphics (if any). not being able to see genital contact isn't hugely important to me, but unmotivatedly cutting away from action is a big wtf

15 points are available for the script (or on-camera communication in the case of gonzo): looking for credibility, originality, consistency throughout the scene, wittiness/intelligence. i'm a writer, words are as important as bodies, if people aren't communicating with each other before or during sex i might as well be watching action figures in dirty poses

10 points are what i'm calling "sjw" points: how much diversity in terms of race, ethnicity, body type, gender presentation, age, or hell even goddamn hair length is there? this matters to me, so it means that many scenes automatically start off with 10 points deducted

what i will not be grading the scenes on on is hotness or notness, not because i don't find some people more attractive than others or some premises or activities more arousing than others, but because nobody but me should care what gets me hard or wet, and i don't care that much myself. and anyway i'm enough of an arts nerd that bad performances, bad camera work, bad editing, bad writing, and bad politics make it harder to get to a place where arousal is even possible.

i don't expect any scene to score 100 this month. i doubt one will be produced all year that would. (but if one is i bet i could name the director now.) this is roughly the same qualitative rubric familiar to u.s. public-school students: you may consider everything below 60 to have received a failing grade

again, performers and producers, use my money to wipe your tears away.

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