shyla jennings and samantha hayes in “i dare you”
scene title: i dare you
performers: shyla jennings, samantha hayes
site: when girls play ◅ twistys (mindgeek)
production credits: none listed
trailer
shyla jennings is almost thirty. here, she plays an eighteen year old, as she has for more than ten years and presumably will continue to do until she retires from the business. i mention this not to shame her for taking roles that her chirpy voice, short stature and still-fresh face allow her to, but to condemn the industry for having so many eighteen-year-old roles to cast her in and so few that allow her to play her actual age and level of experience.
not that she's such a fool as to pretend to not know what she's doing, regardless of what the script says: virginal fumbling isn't erotic. but i'm old and weary enough that neither is the idea (let alone the reality) of an eighteen-year-old. teenagers, as a rule, aren't interesting people. they don't know anything worth knowing, haven't done anything worth doing, aren't capable of conducting their lives in a meaningful way, and are so unfamiliar with their own minds that they're barely the same person from one day to the next. (i guess that's why american culture idolizes teenagers: that's also a description of the national character.) i mean, even aside from it being gross in a porn context. it's uncomfortable enough that samantha hayes is twenty-three, and looks it.
the setup, typical for the when girls play sub-brand of twistys, is minimal and low-effort: samantha and shyla play hooky, calling in a fake excuse for absence, and decide to do "crazy" things like, um, tickling each other's stomachs with ice and leaving notes on cars? my eyes almost got stuck rolling. finally samantha kisses shyla and gets the ball rolling, overcoming her hesitation by daring her to kiss her back.
once the awkwardness of the stupid scenario has been dispensed with, the sex is delightful. shyla jennings is one of the top two or three all-time girl/girl performers, and proves it again here. samantha hayes, who i don't know as well, keeps up well: her little whimpers of anticipation and pleasure are adorable. it's a shame that they are so good at what they're doing that the camera barely knows how to capture it.
the whole scene photographs oddly, and not just because it's backlit by an enormous picture window looking out on the san fernando valley and blowing the light out: it looks like the performer's bodies have been digitally smoothed in some kind of technodystopian version of old-fashioned soft-focus. because it's a mindgeek scene, i have no idea who to blame, but i am pretty sure i know which directors it wasn't. anyway, it looks bizarre and offputting, and the frankly baffling choice of angles that don't capture the action at all doesn't help matters.
i suppose if there must be porn about eighteen year olds, it's better for it to be this awkward, unconvincing, and stagey, the porn version of teen soaps in which everyone is a self-aware adult; i'm dreading the day when an actual teen-fetish site posts something i feel obligated to cover.
performances: 26
cinematography: 15
editing: 12
script: 8
sjw points: 0
total score:
performers: shyla jennings, samantha hayes
site: when girls play ◅ twistys (mindgeek)
production credits: none listed
trailer
 |
| l: samantha hayes, r: shyla jennings |
shyla jennings is almost thirty. here, she plays an eighteen year old, as she has for more than ten years and presumably will continue to do until she retires from the business. i mention this not to shame her for taking roles that her chirpy voice, short stature and still-fresh face allow her to, but to condemn the industry for having so many eighteen-year-old roles to cast her in and so few that allow her to play her actual age and level of experience.
not that she's such a fool as to pretend to not know what she's doing, regardless of what the script says: virginal fumbling isn't erotic. but i'm old and weary enough that neither is the idea (let alone the reality) of an eighteen-year-old. teenagers, as a rule, aren't interesting people. they don't know anything worth knowing, haven't done anything worth doing, aren't capable of conducting their lives in a meaningful way, and are so unfamiliar with their own minds that they're barely the same person from one day to the next. (i guess that's why american culture idolizes teenagers: that's also a description of the national character.) i mean, even aside from it being gross in a porn context. it's uncomfortable enough that samantha hayes is twenty-three, and looks it.
the setup, typical for the when girls play sub-brand of twistys, is minimal and low-effort: samantha and shyla play hooky, calling in a fake excuse for absence, and decide to do "crazy" things like, um, tickling each other's stomachs with ice and leaving notes on cars? my eyes almost got stuck rolling. finally samantha kisses shyla and gets the ball rolling, overcoming her hesitation by daring her to kiss her back.
once the awkwardness of the stupid scenario has been dispensed with, the sex is delightful. shyla jennings is one of the top two or three all-time girl/girl performers, and proves it again here. samantha hayes, who i don't know as well, keeps up well: her little whimpers of anticipation and pleasure are adorable. it's a shame that they are so good at what they're doing that the camera barely knows how to capture it.
the whole scene photographs oddly, and not just because it's backlit by an enormous picture window looking out on the san fernando valley and blowing the light out: it looks like the performer's bodies have been digitally smoothed in some kind of technodystopian version of old-fashioned soft-focus. because it's a mindgeek scene, i have no idea who to blame, but i am pretty sure i know which directors it wasn't. anyway, it looks bizarre and offputting, and the frankly baffling choice of angles that don't capture the action at all doesn't help matters.
i suppose if there must be porn about eighteen year olds, it's better for it to be this awkward, unconvincing, and stagey, the porn version of teen soaps in which everyone is a self-aware adult; i'm dreading the day when an actual teen-fetish site posts something i feel obligated to cover.
performances: 26
cinematography: 15
editing: 12
script: 8
sjw points: 0
total score:
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